Today is Ms. Joan Of Arc’s Deathday. She died in 1431 after claiming that voices from God were telling her to go to war. She gained popularity thus enabling her to achieve her goals. Later her enemies in government convicted her of hearsay and had her burned at the stake. Almost 500 years later the Catholic church made her a saint.

Replacement fun!

Today is President George W. Bush’s 2,322nd day in office. His support died after claiming that voices from God were telling him to go to war. After 9/11, he gained popularity thus enabling him to achieve his goals. Later his enemies in government couldn’t even muster up enough support to even slap him on the wrist. Hopefully, that means that we won’t have to hear the term “Saint Bush” half a millennium from now.

Thanks, Cameron, for the Joan of Arc idea.

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Listening to: “History Repeating” - Propellerheads & Miss Shirley Bassey

Before I go into the back story, I have a confession to make: I think it’s my fault Jerry Falwell died.

Two Fridays ago at the video store, Nancy put in the great documentary The Eyes Of Tammy Faye. I had not seen it, but now wish I had seen it earlier. Think what you want of the Bakkers , but the documentary exposed them for being more naive than the calculating, money-mongers that the press would have you believe. Jim made many bad decisions; however, Tammy Faye was the one living the Christian lifestyle — yes, that’s right — being Christian is a choice. Oh, yes. That was a dig.

She was walking the walk, so to speak. She was doing things that Christianity teaches and not going to church on Sunday to simply relieve herself of any guilt from her actions that many religions would call sins during the rest of the week. Behind the makeup there was a woman with a gigantic heart. The big example of her reaching out to others without judgment was bringing on a gay man living with AIDS as a guest on “The PTL Club” even when some today wouldn’t think of it. In fact, she also tackled drug abuse and other taboo issues when other televised evangelical religious shows would rather refund donations than talk about such ’shameful’ topics.

The part of the documentary that proved this to me was what she said after talking to the pastor with AIDS. Turning to the camera with tears in her eyes (of course, the crying was SOP for her, but I digress), she said:

How sad that we as Christians, who are to be the salt of the earth, and we, who are supposed to be able to love everyone, are afraid so badly of an AIDS patient that we will not go up and put our arm around them and tell that that we care.

I literally did a double-take. “Whaaaaaa? She’s actually practicing what she is preaching?” I said in disbelief to Nancy.

Later on in the documentary the directors explain the downfall of “The PTL Club”. As the Bakkers sink to what they think is their lowest, down descents up ascents Jerry Falwell, who tells them that he would like his ministry to help them through their hard times and even offers to pay them. He asks for their — as Tammy Faye describes it — board-elected salary and benefits. They then show the clip of Falwell walking out for a press conference with this list on Tammy Faye’s own stationary and begins to stigmatize them with words like greed, self-centered and avarice and dares to declare that, even though he loves Jim Bakker, that it would “be a disservice to God and to the church” to allow Jim to come back to the empire he built.

You know what I see? A man smearing the names of his competitors in a hostile, take-over bid in the name of God. In fact, he did what any self-servicing business in a cut-throat capitalist society would do when it sees weakness in its enemies — destroy it utterly. Not really living up to the teachings of Christ, I would think. Of course, this ultimate hypocrisy sank in and my ire started to get the better of me. I turned to Nancy, pointed at the TV and, mustering as much disdain as possible, growled:

“If there really is a God, He would take Falwell out for that alone!”

Four days later Jerry Falwell was dead.

You can probably imagine how eerie it was to get that CNN text message. Of course, I was shunned by my friends who branded as a freak because they were all afraid I would accidentally aim my wrath at them in anger; however, I think they are coming around. They said they are throwing me another party! Although I have no idea what the dunking machine and all the extra wood is for.

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Listening to: “Blue Suede Shoes” - Elvis Presley

This weekend I attended the Remembrance Service of Miss Markie, who a few years ago went through gender reassignment and was then know as Lilian Grace Marlowe. During the service, her sister got up and read the suicide note Lily had sent her. In the eloquently written note is mentioned one of two songs specifically requested played at the service: “Vincent” by Don McLean. Lily told her sister that if she listens to “Vincent”, she could begin to understand what Lily went through in her half century on Earth.

This morning I got out of my hurried shower when my thoughts remind me to buy the two songs. At my computer naked, I purchase and download the two songs, sync my iPod and then quickly run to finish getting ready for work. Rushing between my bedroom and the bathroom a few minutes later, I stop when I hear a familiar series of piano chords thinking out loud that it simply can’t be “American Pie” playing.

It is.

I walk to my computer slowly as everything begins to feel eerie only to walk in the living room to Don singing, “Bye-bye, Miss American Pie”. Well, goodbye to you, too, Miss Lily. Thank you for the great times in those improv classes almost a decade ago. Thank you for your kind words and support at that Monkey show last summer. Thank you for your courage in realizing your own dreams. I simply wish the rest of the world could see beyond the flashy sensationalism of the human skin.

And, yes, I remember your signature color is indeed purple. I’ll see you out on the veranda later and we can catch up.

Listening to: All Apologies - Nirvana

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The other song played at the service was “Secret Gardens” by Judy Collins.

Ever since I wrote that horribly wonderful pun on Tuesday, platypuses have been popping up everywhere. The comment section of the joke is full of great jokes back at me, so people are really into them. Maybe platypus is the new penguin?

Last night at the Monkey’s Uncle gig we played a game called "Secret Word" where we get two words from the audience, place them on either players’ foreheads and, within a scene, the players try to get one another to guess the word they see on the other’s forehead. The word on Larry’s forehead that I got him to get him to guess: platypus.

And then this great post over at Cute Overload today sealed it. It’s officially Platypus Week!

Now go out and lay an egg to celebrate!

Listening to: Champagne Supernova - Oasis