Thanks all of you who sent well wishes either via the Internet or with your mind. I’m feeling much better physically, but am mentally drained. My grandmother passed away this afternoon.

The entire trip to Utah now feels like the most surreal experience of my life. I’ll post more later. Right now, I just feel like being alone for a while; however, between jobs and getting ready for a wedding and a show, I don’t think I’ll get that until next week sometime.

At least I got to see her relatively strong before things spiraled out of control and I had to leave.

Listening to: “Precious Illusions” - Alanis Morrissette

I’m so very done with this. Last Tuesday I started to show symptoms of the ickyness that Cameron and two of my co-workers had. It was the worst on Thursday, but now just keeps lingering around like celebrity gossip. I can’t tell which is worse: waking up drowning in sweat, coughing so hard that I feel like I’m going to vomit or the horrible nightmares caused by the few seconds I caught of The Doodlebops one morning. No really. If you dare the rancid dreams, click on the picture and you will join me in worse vividness than anything Freddy Krueger could invent.

Speaking of rancid, everything I try to eat or drink tastes like cardboard including the coffee I made this morning. I’ll probably just recycle it later. And not the natural way.

To make things worse, the Monkeys have a show tonight (Jazz@Jack’s at 7:30pm. Oh, yeah, I had to plug it) and I’m probably only going to be able to work from the booth and not on stage. This is fine actually as I don’t want to be jumping around on stage making sure that my body’s defenses weaken even more.

I just hope I’m better by Thursday since I’m flying to Utah to visit my mom and to see my grandmother, who unfortunately isn’t expected to make it through the year. It’s… the cancer. Mom’s side of the family has a long history of it and Grandma has been battling it like a trouper for several years now. Unfortunately, all the doctors have now said the same thing: time to put the affairs together and just wait. Her pain medication is continually being upped as her pain intensifies, which many of you know means the beginning of the slow degeneration.

Of course, as typical with my life, the following weekend will be a complete juxtaposition when I witness one of my best friend’s weddings. Matt2 and Leslie are getting married on February 29th (funny in itself) in a wedding at the Oxford Hotel in a stylish 30’s-style ceremony. I also get to MC the event and so got a zoot suit to wear. (Yes, I’ll post pictures.) It should be fun and am glad that the month is ending on this note instead of the other way around.

BTW, if anybody has any advice on traveling while ill, I’ll be glad to hear it. My ears are already stuffed full of crap and don’t want my eardrums blowing out on a short flight to Salt Lake City.

Listening to: “Merely A Man” - XTC

Dear Valentine’s Day,

Words can never say what music can when it comes to the mysterious and strangely bipolar sailings of my heart, so I’ve made you a special music mix to let the world know how I feel about you, Valentine’s Day. The concept is easy. All the songs must have titles that meet this criteria: “*verb* Away”. This lends itself to an extremely eclectic mix of music: Lenny Kravtiz and Nirvana to Will To Power and Culture Club to Art Garfunkel and Christopher Cross. In fact, the Christopher Cross song was the one used the Hawaii episodes of “Growing Pains” — such guilty pleasures.

Don’t be hurt, Valentine’s Day, by song titles such as “Go Away”, “Fly Away”, “Stay Away”, and “Blow Away” — just go away.

Listening to: “Heart Attack” - Olivia Newton-John

No, not me. Sarah Silverman.

Listening to: “Secret” - Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark