In August, I will have been in Denver for 12 years which means at this point I’ve know Hayes for over a decade. I find it hysterical that a few hours after I finish writing this that I’ll be dining with other friends at a — ahem — Red Lobster knowing I first met Hayes in a bowling alley.

We were in a gay bowling league together and I think I made some loud obscure Erasure reference (”La Gloria” from Wild) to another bowler as a joke. Hayes overheard me and struck up a conversation. I didn’t realize at that time that he was less an Erasure fan while more of an Erasure whore. The difference between the two? An Erasure fan you can usually find something that will be a nice gift. An Erasure whore needs some special attention and some extreme creativity because they have everything already.

One year I had an idea and special ordered a multi-colored 12″ single from London after sneakily asking Hayes for a recommendation of his favorite remix. The frame shop was going to glue the vinyl on so I then had to go back and sneakily ask if he had the B-side. Thankfully, he did and I got him something Erasure-esque that he didn’t have.

As you can imagine, it’s getting harder and harder to think of things for him that include his favorite band. This year Lorne, Dan and I went in on getting him two tickets to Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors tour at Red Rocks where Erasure will be performing. (He loved them by the way. Now he has to decide who to take.)

Happy Birthday, Hayes! Thanks for being such a great friend for a decade. You came into my life when I really needed some reliability in my social choices. Thanks for helping move into that first apartment when I needed to leave my ex’s quickly. Thanks for your continued support of my improv habit and Monkey’s Uncle. Thanks for allowing me to throw your first surprise birthday party ever the night Ellen came out on national television. Thanks for allowing me to take you to the emergency room the night you sliced your hand open. But mostly, thanks for letting me drive almost exclusively to San Francisco to see Erasure in concert only to get back and find out they confirmed coming to Denver. (Actually, I still love that we sang “Save Me Darling” at the top of our lungs while going over the Golden Gate Bridge.)

Congrats on selling your condo and keeping Dan around for so long, but mostly congrats on your 36 orbits around the sun.

Cheers to one of the best friends I’ve ever had.

P.S. Just to make sure that you readers know he is more than just his love of Erasure, Hayes is also a roller coaster freak.

It’s like I’m being punished for visiting The Piss Takers. I’m in his gummy bear contest again, so head over there, won’t you? Actually, in all seriousness, you should go over there to read Ed’s blog anyway. It’s damn funny except that he outed me as an improv comedian. Jerk. Now people are going to laugh at me. Or worse, I’ll get this: “You’re a comedian? Say something funny!”

Something funny.

After completing the robot mix the other day (which I just tweaked a third time), I realized that I hadn’t seen this Styx video in many years. Whatever small meaning Dennis DeYoung put into the song about human’s dependence on machinery is completely swept away by the cheesy visual representation of “Mr. Roboto”.

Is it me or does Dennis look more like he should be teaching some higher branch of collegiate mathematics instead of leading a rock band? “Professor DeYoung, how many pieces of eight would be needed for the cornerstone of the Paradise Theater? Is this the best of times to ask or do I have too much of that on my hands?”

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Sorry for the lack of a roundup last week for those that read it regularly. When I checked out from humanity two weeks ago, I didn’t do much reading of blogs — basically my “Must Read” and “Denver” folders only. And now as Wang Chung said, “Let’s go, baby, c’mon!”

Read this remake of “Baby Got Back” on Puntabulous for a laugh. It’s bootylicious.

Jami had this odd, but wonderfully thoughtful take on reality, which reminds me I have a feather tuck scheduled next week.

Have you ever thought seriously about bowling? I mean really hard about what it’s all about? No? Well, Phrog Prince has and you should be ashamed of yourself for not taking bowling more seriously. Thankfully, bowling is good for the soul.

Speaking of thinking, Bad Astronomy blog commented about scientists finding the first Earth-like planet out side our solar system. But before you even think about packing your bags to go, your planet better be clean, little mister and misses. I absolutely forbid you to go and play on another planet until your own is spotless and carefree. What? Because I said so!

Now that Apple has struck a deal with EMI for DRM-free music, they are reaching out to independent artists and labels to do the same for them.

Shorties:
Scott-O-Rama found this very funny video.

Spencer asked Michael Penn some very fun questions. (Note: I would still highly recommend getting Penn’s Mr. Hollywood, Jr., 1947. It’s a great album that just happened to be my favorite of 2005.)

Godwhacker wrote this outstanding essay on Microsoft.

And finally, I give you two items that include great pictures that evoke strong emotions. Robert took this hilarious picture of himself before shaving off his beard and The Hermit received this touching plaque in memory of Suki which now serves as her headstone.