Ann Coulter: A Lesson In Comedy
Wednesday, March 7th, 2007 at 6:07 pm
Faggot. Not “F-word.” Faggot. Not that “hurtful slang.” Faggot.
Who decided that these words are bad or hurtful anyway? Well, in this case, we did. The gay community decided that being called faggot is a low, demeaning and hateful thing. So why are we using euphemisms for it? John Amaechi, the new Human Rights Campaign (HRC) spokesperson, said in their statement that words have power. True… if we let them have power. Every time I read a statement released with one of the above euphemisms instead of faggot I wince because we are giving the word more power.
Ann Coulter’s use of faggot was to insinuate that not only are those of us in the GLBT community sub-human, but that an intelligent, well-spoken, up-and-coming politician is as well. In fact, her excuse of it being a schoolyard taunt is even more wrong. Bullying is simply not cool. It never has been. There are so many anti-bullying organizations now that one would think it was a national disease. It’s a human disease and her reasoning digs her deeper in her hole. Ann Coulter: Schoolyard Bully. Not the best label if one wants to stay in the public eye, so let’s start using it so she will become hugely unpopular! C’mon! Everyone is calling her that now! It’s the cool thing to do.
What we can’t do is say things like “Equal rights for everyone. Except Ann Coulter.” That makes us as hypocritical as Coulter is thoughtless. Distasteful as it is, bantering the Bill Of Rights around would be wrong as well. (Won’t someone think about the Bills Of Rights?!) We live in a country where people can say anything; however, since we find it distasteful, we can use that same right to make our disdain for her words heard. This does actually work sometimes. She is starting to lose some of her advertisers who — it turns out — weren’t even aware that they were sponsoring her.
And frankly, I’m glad that I’ve yet to read of anyone demanding an apology from Coulter, which would be a joke in itself. Anyone can apologize. They are just words. It’s the intent and the actions that give them meaning. Any apologize from her would be completely empty and vapid. She lives for this kind of controversy. I know there are several out there who want to make sure that our community’s outrage is felt, but it has to be done with meaning and thoughtful passion otherwise we are giving her exactly what she wants: our outrage, our ire, our sputtering, emotional retaliation. She eats it like candy — sweet, sweet mean candy. Her apathy for those around her who aren’t paying her meal ticket has seemed to consume her, but I’m hoping she may have chocked on her dinner this time.
As a gay man I am upset, but as a comedian I am utterly offended by Coulter claiming her comment was a joke. First, a joke must be what is commonly known as funny. In order for this to be funny it either has to be hugely surreal and bizarre or have some grain of truth in it. It’s not weird. It’s old-hat and a tired old joke. And from the little I know about him, John Edwards seems to be pretty secure in his sexuality. There are not even rumors to make the joke funny. You see, when we make fun of, for example, Tom Cruise, John Travolta and Kevin Spacey, we aren’t pointing out them per se. The joke is connected to the rumors of them being gay — these big names just happen to be in the line of fire.
Besides, there is one more aspect of her little punchline that she has missed entirely. People aren’t going into rehab for saying faggot. They’re going into rehab for making public asses of themselves.
Which reminds me…
Ann, Betty Ford called. She says your room is ready.
See? That’s how to make an old joke mean and funny.
Listening to: New Year’s Day - U2
March 7th, 2007 at 6:54 pm
I don’t entirely agree that we’re giving the f-word power by not saying it. Like the n-word is for the black community, the word is and should be verboten. I don’t think we should allow anyone in the media get away with saying it anymore. It will be a long time before we “reclaim” the word like we did queer. It’s too hurtful to too many of us.
There is a really good article in this month’s issue of The Advocate I think you’d appreciate. You can find it here: http://www.advocate.com/curren.....p?id=42246
March 7th, 2007 at 7:11 pm
I understand your point, trust me, but someone somewhere has to begin to reclaim the word and start the healing. I’ve been called faggot on several occasions and it was the reason I came to this conclusion. I’ve witnessed too many times the hiding or shunning of something. Say my hiding my being gay in the Navy. The fact that was hiding it gave power to others. Growing up Mormon it was the same.
But believe me when I say that I completely appreciate your point of view about it.
And thanks for the link, I’ve read the first part and am enjoying it.
March 7th, 2007 at 9:57 pm
Wow Howard,
your essay was thoughtful and poignant. Good comedy has a good heart and mind behind it. Two things you clearly have, but Ann is sorely lacking.
March 7th, 2007 at 10:16 pm
That’s like saying the word “cunt” isn’t offensive to … well … cunts.
(Sorry, Howard’s mom — I don’t mean to be vulgar, I’m just making a point. Really.)
March 7th, 2007 at 11:13 pm
As a woman, I can say that Anne Coulter IS a cunt.
And two in one! I get to let out my rage about the skinny crazy bitch, and help de-sensitize another one of the “realllly bad words”
Funny you bring this up, we just had an hour and a half discussion on the use of the N word in class yesterday. Apparently NYC is “banning” the word, where it actually becomes a fine if you use the N word publically (music included)
Best class ever: I actually got to say the C word and the N word out loud in front of 30 people just because it was a “scholarly” context. Maybe I made an ass out of myself by using them, but shit, I was making a fucking good point goddammit. ;)
March 7th, 2007 at 11:15 pm
PS I hope you “got” that last sentence howard
March 8th, 2007 at 6:55 am
Brilliant.
March 8th, 2007 at 8:37 am
You are correct in that schoolyard bullying is as funny as calling someone a faggot. Her comment that
it is ‘just’ a schoolyard taunt trivializes the the effect on the victim. When I was about eleven I was
bullied. The “faggot” was paired with a gut punch several times a week for months. This unfortunately was Pavlovian conditioning. When I did come to be attracted to men, the repression was internalized and it has taken me decades to accept my sexuality.
I thank God that young guys today have gay/straight alliance in the HS and positve perceptions and role models of gayness.
March 8th, 2007 at 9:12 am
I’m all about depowering this word. I use it, often in reference to myself. But, just like I shouldn’t be allowed to call Connecticut WASPY bitches Connecticut WASPY Bitches, I…uh, wait.
So, yeah. If Ann wants to be able to call me a faggot and say it’s a joke and she’d never demean faggots by comparing John Edwards to us, I reserve full use of the right to call her a bitch. Just for starters.
To the real point, though, I do agree we’re just giving her exactly what she wanted, which was to stir the controversy pot and score a bigger advance for her next book, which will be chock full of ad hominem attacks and made up truthiness.
March 8th, 2007 at 9:33 am
Um, just who is this Ann Coulter person? (meaning I know of her, but I choose to ignore her…) and why the heck would any of us care what she says? Isn’t her 15 minutes just about up?
March 8th, 2007 at 9:57 am
Godwhacker:
I know it sounds like a joke, but I really am more offended by her so-called comedic skills than am I of her use of faggot.
Kevin:
Point taken, but I think you secretly just enjoy typing cunt on other blogs. And no need to worry about my mom. It takes much more than ‘dirty’ words to offend her.
Leslie:
You have a scholarly conversation? I’m confused. The NYC rule is asinine. I must reiterate that any random collection of letters only has as much power as you let them have over you. You are all a kilfner — anyone offended? No, because we haven’t given the word any power to cause hurt. Yet.
The more you suppress something, the more human nature makes people use it to simply get away with something. It’s been proven over and over again. This is getting as out of hand as political correctness. We’ve tip-toed around so much that we end up causing even more problems including more outrage and giving people like Coulter more ammo to use it to become famous.
And I have to admit that I don’t get the reference in your last sentence. Don’t hit me!
Kath:
Thanks!
Barden:
Well, they do in ‘progressive’ areas. There are many who don’t have that kind of support and have no one to teach and support them about bullying. Oh, yeah, we as a human race are so self-disillusive about our level of civilization.
Eric:
So you get it. Nice!
Hermit:
If you notice the piece has a lot to do with the gay community’s reaction and not necessarily about Coulter herself. Although, she completely offended my comedic sense by calling anything ’shocking’ she says a joke. :)
March 8th, 2007 at 10:08 am
Ok, the last post was said in haste. Here’s a little more well-thought out response.
Ann Coulter has claimed that liberals are godless, and that she, by extension, is not. Ann, Ann, Ann, let’s talk about the golden rule.
But isn’t it nice that a poster child of the far right has finally exposed their true feelings, so that the entire country can see whether they really agree with the far right?
The America I know does not stand for hatred, nor intolerance. We have a proud history of sticking up for the oppressed, the little guy, the stomped on. Ms. Coulter’s constant references to physical characteristics, sexual orientation, and religious beliefs of those she criticizes tells us a good deal about her inability to address ideas or opinions.
She said the word she used was a schoolyard taunt. Maybe so. But no parent I know would tolerate its use in the schoolyard or in the home.
But you know what bothers me more than this recalcitrant, mean-spirited, morally bankrupt, unimaginative, manipulative, homophobic, hypocritical hatemonger’s words? The applause she received in the room.
Far right politicians beware: Ms. Coulter’s ugly remarks and the applause they received are calling attention to the fact that the emperor has no clothes.
Oh, and note to the American Bar Assocation: Ms. Coulter’s venom doesnt exactly make us feel warm and fuzzy about attorneys, either. Maybe it’s time to evaluate whether you really want her claiming to be an attorney?
March 8th, 2007 at 10:29 am
THAT’S the Hermit I know and love. :)
March 8th, 2007 at 10:30 am
Verbose, of course… That’s me!
March 8th, 2007 at 10:31 am
The problem with America is there are two kinds of humor. There’s smart, intelligent humor (i.e. Jon Stewart) and there’s cheap, brainless humor (i.e. “get ‘er done!”). Sadly, it seems more Americans (like her) fall for the latter and think calling names is funny (as opposed to cleverly constructed sarcasm).
I don’t.
Although admittedly (and ashamedly) I can’t not giggle when someone farts.
March 8th, 2007 at 10:41 am
A thought about comedy: A true comedian (or comedienne) must have humility, and the ability to laugh at himself or herself. When a person makes a joke at the expense of others, it’s just mean. When a person makes a joke about others, but includes himself or herself in the category that the others are in, that’s funny, and self-deprecating, and human. And that’s probably why when someone emits gas (at either end) we laugh… because we all know we do it…
March 8th, 2007 at 10:57 am
Oh, I don’t. I always smell like daisies. But the “little people” have gas, and that’s funny. Even funnier is when they hold those little homemade cardboard signs by the side of the freeway.
Comedy gold.
March 8th, 2007 at 11:16 am
That’s why I miss Dan Savage being addressed as “Hey Faggot” in his advice column. He was trying to take the word back. I guess you have to sell out when you get syndicated.
March 8th, 2007 at 11:36 am
Very Well Said, Faggot! ;)
March 8th, 2007 at 11:44 am
well done Howard.
March 8th, 2007 at 11:45 am
Kevin:
Guffawing at farts is much more appropriate.
Hermit:
And as you know I love me some deprecating humor.
Dan:
That’s funny you should mention that. ClizBiz and I were having that same discussion at lunch yesterday when she was offering advice for the essay and came to the exact same conclusion. In order to make it big, you do have to make some concessions. Dammit.
Hayes:
HEY! Now of that kind of talk on this blog! Unless it was a endearing pet name — then it’s okay.
March 8th, 2007 at 11:54 am
you do know that my tongue was planted firmly in cheek, correct?
March 8th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
oh endearing of course Howard :)
March 8th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
Hubs:
Thanks, man!
Kevin:
As one performer to another: oh, yes. I know exactly where your tongue is.
Hayes:
Okay, the comment stays then.
March 8th, 2007 at 12:54 pm
Howard, it is so refreshing to find someone who knows exactly what I mean … and who can comment on it in such an equally dirty-yet-not-dirty way.
March 8th, 2007 at 1:14 pm
Whoa. I’m late to the party! Hey, um, me too!
Truthily speaking, I’ve already expressed my feeling about Ms. Coulter and agree with Dan that I miss the “Dear Faggot” address in Savage Love. I felt this was a great way to take the stinger out of the word and make it mainstream and therefore, meaningless.
Also, as a side note, one of the best books on feminism I’ve ever read was called “Cunt” currently for sale at Amazon.com! Wheeee!
March 8th, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Yay for ClizBiz! She’s a keeper!
March 8th, 2007 at 5:03 pm
Excellent rant Howard. I had no idea who she was until that thing happened, and to be honest I haven’t got any intention of knowing anything else about her!
March 8th, 2007 at 5:44 pm
I tell you what - I don’t know what to think any more. I would never call someone a faggot, and if someone were to call me a nigger, we would have a problem. That said…
I would have to take each case individually - if a white guy said to me, you my nigga- I would say - dude - not cool. Not because I would be offended, but because it would sound moronic.
I think we get too caught up in words. I think the most racist, bigoted people in public view are smart enough to say nothing to be held against them.
One of my favorite songs of my youth was Money for Nothing by Dire Straits. That little faggot with the diamond and the make-up - yeah buddy that’s his own hair, that little faggot got his own jet airplane, that little faggot is a millionaire. That made me cringe upon hearing it. I don’t know if I can hear that song without cringing now. Should I?
As for Ms. Coulter - she isn’t worth the thought that we’ve all been devoting to her. She is manipulative and by saying these moronic things - only seeks to gain more attention. We all need to stop paying attention.
Although I pray she calls Obama a nigger one day.
March 8th, 2007 at 8:11 pm
I can’t add anything that hasn’t already been added — but this was a GREAT POST, Howard! You can tell you worked realy hard on it.
(PS. And grief, that woman is an idiot)
March 8th, 2007 at 9:38 pm
Your google adwords says “Are you Gay? Take the 20 questions quizz, find out free!”
March 8th, 2007 at 9:38 pm
Yes - this is a great post.
March 8th, 2007 at 10:06 pm
Kevin:
Ahh, you’re sweet… I think. :) And isn’t Cliz great? Speaking of which,
Cliz:
Thank you very much for giving this piece a good once over and making it a bit tighter. And for having lunch! Fun times! Have a great time in Austion (sooooo jealous)
Kav:
Ahhh, to be naive again. and thanks.
Spencer:
What can I say, man. You make excellent, excellent points. Bringing up Dire Straits really sent me back. In fact, I remember thinking even back then that I wasn’t going to let faggot bother me. It took some work to let it go, but it’s also great to have its impace lessened. And I couldn’t agree more, if we stop giving her attention, she will eventually go away. This is the reason this post almost didn’t get written.
And that last sentence is classic. How I wish she’d do the same thing.
HDW:
But still you stopping by is enough. :)
Hubs:
THAT’S comedy!
Spencer, Part II:
Thanks. I really do appreciate that.
March 8th, 2007 at 10:21 pm
But you all know that the Dire Straits wrote that song about themselves … they literally overheard some delivery guys saying that about them.
So in those terms … it’s making the same point that we have done by using the term (and others) here …
The More You Know ….
*cue music and rainbow & stars*
March 9th, 2007 at 10:03 am
Kevin - thank you so much for that. It makes me feel more at ease about that song.
March 9th, 2007 at 10:29 am
Yes, thanks, Kevin. I didn’t know that either.
…and knowing is half the battle.
*cue animated war mongering*
March 9th, 2007 at 1:56 pm
No problem. What can I say, I’m a giver. Give, give, give. That’s me. Spreading twinkles and harmony and sunshine and kittens to everyone around.
March 9th, 2007 at 1:56 pm
And yeah, those are all strippers.
March 10th, 2007 at 2:51 pm
Also, “Money for Nothing” is like a South Park episode. It’s making fun of the person using the word in character.
Oh, and Borat is making fun of the US, not Kazakhstan.
March 11th, 2007 at 9:05 am
[...] has posted his rant on the whole Ann Coulter controversy. And it isn’t necessarily the stance that most have been taking, but I would have to say I [...]
March 11th, 2007 at 4:41 pm
Do people still get excited about being called “faggot”? Really? Get a grip, guys. No… lower. There you go.
Ann Coulter. Heh heh heh. Talk about people “famous for not being famous”. Someone throw a bucket of water on the old witch, and let’s be done with it.
March 11th, 2007 at 8:04 pm
Kevin:
Stripper names! Ha! Funny.
Godwhacker:
Yes, and yes.
Zeph:
That’s naughty and I love it.
March 16th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
Is it a case of forgive and fagette?
It still confuses me that you’re called Howard.
March 16th, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Me, too. I just got the email from you comment and didn’t remember leaving the above message on my blog. Frankly, I like the fact that there is another gay man out there named Howard.
March 17th, 2007 at 5:51 am
This has to be the longest time I’ve spent on just one of your blog posts, not only reading the entry but all the comments as well - 44, wow!
This woman Coulter sounds like just the kind of American you can keep. We’ll take your music, your celebs, some of us even take your fast food - hell, some saddos even take your most extreme export, religious fundamentalism - but you can keep this retrograde, ugly-on-the-inside person. She’s horrible.
She gives the cerebral cortex a bad name, because in her case, it’s certainly not doing much of a job controlling her mouth. I suggest it might not be the cerebral cortex to blame, so let’s take it out and test it by transplanting it into a sea anemone. If the sea anemone starts calling the starfishes faggots, we can cook it - but there’s every chance the sea anemone might be able to make much better use of her cerebral cortex. It’d look prettier too.
And like Coulter attracts clowns, the sea anemone attracts clown fish which are prettier and less inclined to acts of gross stupidity and ignorance.
Yeah, on balance sea anemones are much nicer than this Coulter woman and do far more to please the eye and soul. x
June 27th, 2007 at 1:32 pm
On Ann Coulter- If what she say’s, most based on fact, bothers you. Then express yourself! But… We can’t act as if our opinion should be wrote in stone, as we should’nt of her’s. I’m not a John Edwards fan. My opinion of him is that he is a lier and has his own personal political agenda! The differance in the two is… His opinions, in a position of power, can directly affect my wellfare! Her’s never will! If she called him a “faggot” so be it! Our President was refered as “Satan”, Condy Rice and Colin Powell were refered to as “White Mans Pawns” by Harry Belefonte! I didn’t hear allot of outrage then! So… If you don’t like what she’s says speak out! But remember, if you don’t understand her ideoligies then you don’t understand the basis of her statment! Words do have power… The “N” word has tremendous power in our culture. Only… if it is used in the contects of a racist remark! Not when it is used in a Rape song, or one black man jokeing with another. We don’t care because it has no barring on our life’s… Or does it? JACK
June 27th, 2007 at 1:51 pm
I can’t tell if you are commenting on the post or on comments, but I believe I did express myself about it. I wrote an entire post about it. Of course, my post is also how the gay community is also letting words have power. I said that in the post. Did you read the post? I wonder.